Looking around the web the other day, I came across another instance of the “you’re just a loser who can’t get laid” ad hominem, delivered by a feminist to some fellow making an uncongenial argument. It occurred to me that this might expose a feminist hypocrisy when contrasted with the “fat acceptance” and/or “women shouldn’t be sexually objectified” memes — but a moment’s reflection convinced me that this was not so. On the contrary, women in general and feminists in particular are remarkably consistent in their view that a person’s worth is intimately bound up with his (or her) sexual attractiveness; they just don’t like the idea that women might have to do anything inconvenient in order to be sexually attractive.
You Can’t Get Laid (YCGL)
When you stop to think about it, YCGL is a pretty strange thing to say. It’s not an argument, and it’s not even an obviously relevant ad hominem (you’re stupid, you’re a liar, you’re corrupt, you’re a troll, &c.). It can only be understood as either a silly schoolyard taunt, or as a claim that the target has so little status/worth that he can simply be ignored. Aside from the logical problems with the latter, it reveals some things about the psychology of the accuser.
YCGL translates to “you’re worthless” if and only if a person’s worth is identical with his sexual attractiveness. When feminists seek to run down a man, they don’t instinctively call him weak, cowardly, poor, or stupid; they call him unattractive. To a man, this is pretty weird; being attractive to women is about 150th on the list of things that make a man great. But, to a woman, apparently it’s dispositive.
The flip side of this is the feminist hatred of being judged, of men having standards, &c. To a feminist, every woman is beautiful, and only a troglodyte misogynist chauvinist evil man-animal would ever say otherwise. Fat pig? Face like a horse? Personality that can etch glass? How dare you judge her, evil man! You’re probably just a bitter loser who can’t get laid!
Why do feminists hate male standards so much? Because, to them, to call a woman unattractive is not simply to make a factual statement. To them, an unattractive woman is worthless. This can be seen in their response to male judgement: They do not dismiss it as irrelevant (“Yes, she’s ugly. So?”) — instead, they deny reality to negate that judgement (“No, she’s beautiful! All 450 pounds of her!”).
The feminist desire is not to create a world in which sexual attractiveness does not matter; it’s to create a world in which standards of sexual attractiveness are those convenient for feminists. Ideally, a world in which all women are judged to be sexually attractive, in which women need do nothing (maintain chastity, keep the pounds off, dress nicely, behave well, display virtue) to maintain their sexual value, and in which men attach extra value to those things feminists would prefer (advanced degrees, inflated title, leftist politics). And, of course, a world in which they can judge men however they wish, completely ignoring and dismissing those found unattractive.
This is, of course, a ridiculous and unattainable goal, but I claim that if you keep it in mind, you’ll be able to predict feminist behavior much more easily.